Although the news wasn't unexpected, it still hit me like a speeding train and I spent most of yesterday in my room crying. I'm welling-up again now and I thought I was all cried-out!
I never chatted with Razz but we did exchange emails and comments. He was the first person to comment on my blog, and also to follow it. I loved his sense of humour, fun and adventure and his zest for life!
During my time offline while I was moving etc. I managed to check my emails one day and torchy! had sent me a copy of Razz's post about his illness. Of course I was completely gutted but I couldn't email him from the place I was actually checking my email, so I had no choice but to wait until our ISP sorted out our Internet connection at home. Eventually it was sorted out and shortly before he died we exchanged emails. This is an excerpt from mine: "... that since I'd been offline I'd been wondering whether I was doing the right thing by ridding myself of my home and belongings, and heading off to Spain. After reading your post (which torchy! copied for me while I was away) I decided that it was most definitely the right thing to do... life is too short and precious to waste. We never know what's around the corner, so we should seize the moment whenever and wherever we can."
I emailed him again with replies to some questions he'd asked, but alas, I didn't get a reply... now I know why. Razz's death has served to reinforce my thoughts, and my decision, and I will truly miss him for many reasons.
The following excerpt was taken from Razz's post:
Talking about death at the local
"at the pub, we got to talking about stuff. death was one of the topics of the conversation - a perfect one for such a dreary day. we came to the conclusion that if one really look closely at why he/she fears death, it is really because of what lies after death. maybe a lot of you have already realised this, but i had never really thought much about this until this afternoon. some would say there is nothing after death, whilst others may be believe in the heavenly afterlife, or doomed one in hell. for now, i'm taking the middle ground and say that there is an afterlife, but an afterlife where we have control of its quality, just like this life."
I hope he's right, and that he's taking control of his new life right now!
I'm going to try my hardest to get along to Brighton Pride this year, and while I'm there I'll have a pint (or two) for him!
God Bless You Razz!